Tomorrow I get to spend 10 hours by myself. Ten hours listening to music, listening to sermons, calling friends, praying, singing, and sitting in silence. Sometimes I dread this drive, but tomorrow I yearn for it. I am so excited to have time to just sit and be. To think about life. To pray and truly lift up all the thoughts that have been running through my head. Time to be with Jesus alone, with no interruptions.
I feel Jesus right now. At this time in my life, I feel His presence. And I’m realizing that He hasn’t moved a bit. I don’t think I was aware of how far I had strayed. I feel like I’m closer to living my life how it’s supposed to be lived now than I ever have before. I feel joy and I feel Jesus. And it’s a great feeling. Why do I forget this feeling? Why do I let the world win sometimes? Why do I let the world take over? Why is the world’s voice louder than the Lord’s? How does that happen? One day turns into another, and then all of a sudden I haven’t been in the Word in a week. And then I spend a quick 20 minute scanning, just to tell myself I did it. Then all of a sudden it’s been 2 weeks and I haven’t sought Jesus. I haven’t looked for Him. I haven’t interacted with Him. I haven’t recognized Him in anything I do, never mind everything. I don’t want to go back to that. The world will not win. I will choose joy and I will choose Jesus…today, tomorrow, and every day after that.
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